Dear Reader,
This letter is about you.
It’s about how you can have an easier, more successful and more rewarding life.
A life where opportunities are offered to you, doors are opened and more people say yes to your ideas.
A life where you have the power to influence everyone you meet .
You see the most successful people in life are not the most intelligent, wealthy or beautiful. The most successful people are those who can influence and persuade others to take action .
Do you struggle to get friends, family or clients to listen and go along with your suggestions?
Do you have a difficult boss, colleague or clients who resist your ideas?
Have you ever missed a career or income enhancing opportunity because you failed to persuade?
Would you like to be admired, command more respect and authority without being pushy?
Would you like to rise to the top of your profession?
If so, you are in the right place.
As you are about to discover your ability to ethically influence and persuade others is the greatest SHORTCUT to having the life of your dreams.
Sadly most people have never been taught how to persuade and those that have been, have been trained to persuade in a way that has three very big problems.
Let me explain…
3 Very Big Problems With
Traditional Approaches To Persuasion
Traditional approaches to persuasion are typically taught as something a person does to someone else that involves a mixture of reasoning, argument and in more recent decades… ‘covert’ language patterns…
… all designed to get the listener to agree with you.
To say “yes”.
These are all examples of ‘ Outside – In Persuasion .’
The persuader starts from their point of view and tries to push their ideas into the listener’s mind via a variety of tactics and often so called “covert language patterns.”
And if they meet resistance, they are taught to overcome resistance by arousing emotion, stacking tactics and using sneaky language patterns and tricks to hit all of a person’s hot buttons to persuade.
Do these work? Yes sometimes, but…
Problem #1: It works mostly for the short term
If a person is skilled at using language patterns, anchoring and triggering states, stacking a person’s hot- buttons etc., it is possible to “persuade” a wide variety of people to say “yes” in the short-term , to something that may not be in their best interest.
A student of this approach to persuasion may get ‘a win’ and even boast about dominating the other person.
Especially if the other person isn’t schooled in how to defend themselves from this type of “persuasion.”
However… when you step back and think about it, it’s not really persuasion…
Problem #2: It’s closer to coercion than actual persuasion
Entire book shelves can be filled with the tools and tactics used by operators of “anything goes” persuasion.
Besides many practices being of questionable ethics, it’s got another big shortcoming…
Problem #3: It only works in under a specific set of situations.
Typically one-off persuasion, negotiation or influencing scenarios.
Contexts where you don’t have to see (or do business with) that person again.
Situation where you can get by with using certain questionable and sneaky persuasion tactics.
YET…
… if you are a manager, coach, consultant, sales professional or people helper etc ., indeed in almost any profession; whatever you do to influence, persuade and secure more Yeses needs to work in the long term and be useable in any environment if you want to be successful and effective beyond one persuasion engagement.
(This is true also in your personal life at home, as it is in work .)
If you use short-term persuasion tactics that leave the other person feeling boxed in, cornered, duped or manipulated etc. then you will develop a reputation for being untrustworthy and someone to interact with caution.
And the next time you need to influence that person, you will experience massive resistance .
Which means you will need to “persuade” twice as hard!
This is secret downside rarely talked about in the outside-in tactics focused approach to covert persuasion.
Many teachers of this style teach persuasion as a toolset designed to dominate others, to “ never lose an argument” and “always win .”
Even they don’t achieve that.
That doesn’t stop them pitching language pattern after language pattern and short term tactics, with little consideration for how this form of “persuasion” impacts any ongoing relationships you have with those persons, in contexts like business, sales or your personal life.
It’s a “ I win, they lose ” approach that doesn’t work when you have to interact with that person again.
Thankfully there is a NEW approach to persuasion that is ethical, elegant and works both in the short and long term. It’s the purest form of persuasion that flips the switch on old outdated approach.
You can even use this framework to build on any prior training on persuasion you may have had.
It’s starts from an inside-out relationship focused approach.
